Eye Opener

Thank you so much for your honesty Telitha! You are such a blessing and inspiration to me! I think what hit me the most was this part:

Turn to me and be gracious to me
For I am lonely and afflicted
The troubles of my heart are enlarged
Bring me out of my distresses
Look upon my affliction and my trouble
and forgive all my sins.

That right there is my prayer to the Lord. About a month ago I made a post that it was a bad week and I wasn't in the Word, I pray that God would give me the strength and power, and ability to stop what I'm doing and focus on Him, and lately I realized that He does give me that power everyday, I just choose not to do it! How crazy am I? Here is this incredible Father who loves me so much and I can't stop and give Him the time of day! I realize that my prayer should not be for the strength to do it, but I should be on my knees praying for forgiveness for not spending time with Him! It's not up to the Lord whether or not I spend time with Him, it's my responsibility, and I want to, yet I find it easy to not do it and say I'm sorry God everynight... but I can't keep doing that!

So now the devil is putting thoughts and feelings in my heart that if I can't take time to spend with my Savior maybe I don't love Him as much as I should... but that's not true!!!!! I want to spend time with the Lord!!!! And I am going to!! Nothing should be more important that spending time with my Heavenly Father, I've put way too many things in front of that and it has got to stop....

Ladies..... please please please please pray for me..... and please pray for Jeremy and me that we would spend time praying together and spending time in the Word together.... I want to be honest with you three... we don't do that.... and I know that the husband is the spiritual leader so I struggle with whether or not I'm supposed to initiate it or if I'm supposed to wait for him and be an example in my own walk with the Lord.... don't get me wrong, Jeremy is a fantastic husband and a great leader, but he is just now learning how to have his own walk in the Lord and growing so much right now, and I am re-learning (yes i know that may sound weird) how to grow in Christ... please just pray for the both of us!

I don't know if any of that made sense.... I didn't even know when I started writing this post that any of that was going to come out, but it did, so I truely believe that God wanted me to share that with you...